Penni’s Testimony
Self-serving. That’s how I started out. Just like all children do, ego-centric, separated from God, and primarily concerned with getting my needs met. If a child is being raised with faith, then as they grow, they are taught to look to God for purpose and provision. But I was not raised with faith. I was raised to be self-reliant, to handle my issues on my own, and to toughen up when things were hard, which they often were. The minimal exposure I had to my Creator was not sufficiently adequate to acquaint me with His character or His love.
So, I grew up living life as my own boss, leaning on my own understanding, and being in charge of my own fate.
I didn’t know God, but of course, He knew me. In hindsight, I can see that He was never far away, sometimes even knocking at the door of my heart. But for my first 30 years, I thought I was managing well enough, so I never invited Him in. Until the world got the better of me, and I wasn’t managing well enough anymore. Life can be difficult, even cruel, and despite trying everything humanly possible, I was unable to fix all that was broken in my life. When I was at my very lowest, hopeless and desperate, I finally surrendered control and, literally on my knees, cried out to God.
And He was there, ready to lift me out of the mire and mess I’d made of my life, and spare me the pain and darkness of a life lived in sin. Because in God’s great wisdom, He sent His sinless son Jesus, who willingly walked to His own crucifixion, bearing every sin I’ve ever committed, so I could be washed clean, have all of my mistakes put behind me, and be forgiven.
He didn’t do that just so I could live a life, but rather THE LIFE. The life He intended for me from before the beginning of time, before I was formed in the womb before I breathed my first breath. It’s an abundant, amazing life. More life than I could have hoped for or imagined on my own. He fixes what’s broken, heals what hurts, lightens our loads, and rights our wrongs. He can take an angry, bitter, rebellious heart and fill it full of JOY!
That only happens because He is who He says He is. Not just a gifted teacher, a prophet, or a really good man of God. But He is the Son of God, The Living Word, The Image of the Almighty, The Author of all Creation, The Bread of Life, the Lion of Judah, the Light of the world, Provider, Protector, the Truth, the Life, the unspeakable gift of God. The Lamb that was slain, so that I could have life. In the power of His life and death and resurrection, He transformed me and made me new.
2 Corinthians 5 says “For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them, and was raised again. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has gone, the new has come”.
Every day I thank Him for this gift of new life. Every day I strive to know Him more. And every day it is my honor and privilege to serve Him.
Penni Scott
CEF BuxMont Director